This whole site could be seen as a guide on how to meet girls online. I write a lot about the topic, but I wanted to simplify things for guys first starting online dating. Meeting women online follows an exponential curve, like many things in life. At first, you’ll probably struggle to land a date with a “six” you’d smash once. Then you’d kick out of your studio apartment because “you just can’t sleep with someone else in the bed” or another excuse.
Once you figure out how online dating works, you’ll find a pick of cute girls practically begging to meet you. It’s really that easy, but a lot of guys bag on it because they don’t get results from the jump. If you’ve been macking chicks at bars for the last eight years – why would you be able to meet the same quality women from online dating the first time you download an app? Everything takes practice and experience always helps.
With this in mind, here’s exactly how to meet girls online:
The basics regarding how to meet girls online start with your home. Before you start spamming chicks or downloading every app you can think of – you must get your logistics on point. I. Cannot. Stress. This. Enough. You’ll drastically reduce your learning curve by renting a shitty studio with a crusty queen mattress from Craigslist on the floor (compared to living anywhere outside the best areas of a city). Of course, a nice place in the best area is better, but that’s beside the point. The suburbs are pussy purgatory, but so is driving anywhere. You need to be able to WALK to multiple bars from your apartment or home.
Driving dries up the pussy. If you meet her at a bar and then you both have to drive back separately to your place – that’s time she spends thinking logically, not emotionally. You lose if she’s thinking logically on a date. Plus, there are worries of drunk driving for both parties. Another huge negative. However, if you have a place next to ten or so bars, you can easily tell her to take a taxi or park at your place and then walk to a bar.
Deciding What You Want
Once you have logistics sorted out in some manner, you can move on to actually meeting girls online. To begin, you’ll want to figure out exactly what you want from online dating. Do you want to meet your wife (not exactly recommended)? Are you looking for a girlfriend? Would you prefer a few casual relationships with cute girls? Or are you trying to make sexy time with as many hot chicks as humanly possible?
It doesn’t matter to me. Just be your fucking self. Be honest with your desires. Society may tell you one thing, but if you want to have sex with a lot of girls – do it. Your boys may tell you one thing, but if you want to find a loyal girlfriend – do it. This isn’t complicated, but I’ve met a number of dudes prowling Tinder all day, every day only to be confused why they can’t find a girlfriend. The first step in how to meet girls online is going after what you want.
Selecting a Site(s)
Selecting the best online dating site(s) will be pretty damn easy once you decide what you’re looking for. The only other factors in selecting sites are age and location. Different age groups of men will need to use different sites. Men in different cities may find some sites better than others. Online dating sites have a lot of variables at play, which will ultimately determine if you get laid using the site or not.
I’ll do a quick breakdown of sites to use in the United States (and other western nations). This won’t be too detailed, but you’ll get the picture. I’d start using one to two sites if you live in a large metro area. If you’re in a small city or town – feel free to spam every site you can find.
- Tinder: The most popular dating app ever is a great choice for men under the age of 35 looking for one night stands, flings, and casual dating. I wouldn’t recommend looking for your next girlfriend on Tinder, but it can be done. Tinder Plus is usually worth it. Optimize your Tinder “game” here.
- OkCupid: This is the classic free dating site for men in the United States. Nearly any guy who has used online dating for some amount of time has gotten a bang off OkCupid. The girls range from cute, girl-next-door types to absolute freakshows, but you can find some normal, cute chicks on the site that just want to date around casually. OkCupid is the perfect starter site for men of nearly all ages looking to date casually. Learn more about cracking OkCupid here.
- Match.com: The best paid dating site in the United States is Match.com. You’d be a fool to not use this online dating a couple of months a year if you’re over the age of 35 (or 30). If you’re a man looking to meet his girlfriend or wife through online dating, then Match.com is going to be the site you’ll want to check out.
- Plenty of Fish: I once harbored a slight affinity for Plenty of Fish, or POF. The girls inhabiting POF throughout yesteryear were of the looser moral variety. The site didn’t get the name “Plenty of Skanks” for nothing. That said – POF blows now. Unless you’re in a few areas (I’ve heard it’s decent in Vegas and Mexico), you’ll be wasting your time on the site.
- Badoo: Badoo can be a cool site to use, but it varies wildly. You’ll also encounter a lot of freaks (read trannies) on Badoo. Luckily, it’s easy to spot one of these weirdos, but I don’t touch the site any longer unless I’m in Latin America. If you plan to visit the Dominican Republic, Colombia, Mexico, Venezuela, or another Latin country – give it a try and sign up here.
- Seeking Arrangements: I have not tried this site, but I’ve heard rave reviews through the grapevine. You’ll need strong game and frame to work this site without paying for it, but the girls will be hot. Really. Fucking. Hot. If you possess some “game” and can flash cash without spending it – I’d sign up for Seeking Arrangements.
If you’re living internationally, then the online dating sites you’ll use will vary a bit. Tinder and OkCupid will both have decent numbers and successes internationally, especially Tinder. In certain countries, you’ll have access to Tinder and a Cupid Media site. For example, a man looking for loving online could use Tinder and:
PS: Cupid Media sites do cost a bit of money, but you can sign up for free & browse through the girls.
Congruency is Key
Once you’ve selected a site or three, you’ll begin to create your online dating profiles. It’s important to keep an air of congruency throughout your online dating profile. Your photos cannot show you as a friendly, nice guy and then your profile reads like you’re a raging douche. In similar fashion, you’d want to avoid coming off like too much of a douche on Match.com, but that would be perfectly acceptable on POF.
I’ve talked a little bit about photos here. Your photos should be a direct result of what women like. Girls love a man dressed up. Girls love money. Girls love puppies. Girls love six-pack abs. While there’s more to it – the key is to show off your best elements to a woman in a socially acceptable way. If you’re in good shape and are looking to get laid – a shirtless picture is a great way to go. However, I’ve found shirtless mirror selfies are usually frowned upon. It’s better to have a picture of your body looking great while doing something. At the lake. On the beach. In your Halloween costume.
If you’re in good shape and are looking to get laid – a shirtless picture is a great way to go. However, I’ve found shirtless mirror selfies are usually frowned upon. It’s better to have a picture of your body looking great while doing something. At the lake. On the beach. In your Halloween costume. Doing one of those gay “mudder” competitions. If you have a great body and look like you actually have a life – girls will flock. Weird, right?
Pictures dressed like a suave gentleman are dope, too. Picks with puppies will drop panties. Smile. Or don’t. The key is to not look like a sniveling beta while smiling. A smirk will achieve what you want. Ultimately, your best photos will come down to you and the life you’ve lived.
Less is more, but you need something that captures her attention. Again, a focus on congruency is needed. your profile will come down to what sites your using, who you are, and what you’re looking for. Read a couple of articles about the topic to get a better idea. I like these:
- How to Write your Tinder Bio (by yours truly)
- No Models, Actresses, Bartenders, or Strippers
- Rooster’s Guide to Plenty of Fish
I’ve written extensively about online dating opening messages. You can read this post to learn more. My book, The Tinder Template features a longer list. So does Cracking OkCupid by Kyle that I mentioned earlier.
Find a few online dating openers that are congruent with your profile. Then spam them out to any girl you want to talk to. I keep a list of the few online dating openers on my computer and phone, so spamming is as efficient as possible. No time typing means more time for making sweet loving.
Situational, but I’ll give you a few tips. First – you can have responses to your opening messages saved in the same places you have your openers. Once you have spammed 400-500 chicks, you’ll start to see patterns forming. Ideally, you chat with a girl for 3-7 back and forth messages and then get her number. You don’t need to get into a deep conversation with a girl online to get her number. Message back and forth a bit and then escalate the interaction quickly by going for the number.
Getting Her Number
There are a million ways to get a girls number online. I’ve tried them all. Some will be more effective than others. To keep things basic, you can just say, “we should grab a drink sometime if you want” and then she’ll usually say yes. You then respond, “cool what’s you number” and she’ll send it. You can also say, “lets text just easier” and she’ll usually ok. Then you say “cool what’s number” and she sends it.
This may seem oversimplified, but you don’t want to deal with girls who are playing games online. You’ll waste too much of your life. If she puts up any resistance to giving out her number, then she is playing games or not interested in you. Discard her and move to the next girl you’ve spammed.
Texting Her Quick
Text her immediately when you get her number. Don’t try to be cool and wait a day or three. Fuck that. Stay in the front of her mind and force the issue. Continue your conversation and build some comfort with her. I have to assume you’ve all chatted with girls through text before.
The best way to not meet girls online is to bullshit. You won’t want to chat forever. Build some comfort and then push for a date. A girl online is bound to forget about you if you don’t meet within the first 3-5 days of exchanging numbers online. Sure, there are exceptions, but girls online play the field just like you. She’s talking with ten other guys. If you don’t meet her, then you’re bound to get lumped into the back of her pack. This means she’ll forget about you and you’ll have about a zero percent chance of penetrating any part of her during some loving.
How to Meet Girls Online
If you’re a man curious how to meet girls online, then the advice above should give your a good start. You’re bound to be head and shoulders above the average chump just by applying the above. It may take you 3-4 months to figure out online dating, but you will.
If you’re looking for a quicker solution, I recently released the best online dating package on the Internet with my friend Kyle from ThisIsTrouble.com. For Valentines Day, we created the How to Meet Girls Online Package. This packaged is guaranteed to reduce your learning curve online and have you meeting cute chicks in no time. Click here to learn more.