Think Your Girlfriend or Wife is Cheating on You?
Photo by Dmytro Zinkevych
Arguably one of the worst feelings in the world is suspecting that your wife or girlfriend could be cheating on you. Thinking about the lying, her closeness to another person; it can almost be too much to take. Every time you look at her, it’s all you can think about.
The only way to really move on from that feeling of betrayal is to actually confirm your suspicions (or, hopefully, her innocence). All it takes is a little detective work to get the evidence you need to actually confront her. Try the following techniques to get that kind of information discreetly (and legally):
Be Observant About How She’s Acting Lately
The thing is, you probably started to feel suspicious that your girlfriend or wife is cheating on you for the very reason that she has started to behave differently around you. That in itself is not concrete evidence of cheating, of course, but certain behaviors can point to cheating more than others. So, start to study those behaviors a bit more closely, and pinpoint those that feel especially wrong to you.
Is she staying late at the office more than usual? Has she changed how she dresses or does her hair? Has she become less (or yes, more) affectionate lately? By keeping a close eye on how’s she’s acting, you can see if that points to cheating directly, or as a result of her guilt about cheating.
Check Unknown Phone Numbers
You should not just go through your partner’s phone without her permission; that is an invasion of privacy. But if you keep seeing an unknown phone number come up on their screen multiple times, there’s nothing legal or immoral stopping you from noting that number and looking it up to see who the person behind it might be.
With an online reverse phone lookup, you simply enter the full phone number, and then you can see the available public records information associated with that number. This could include the phone owner’s name, where they’re located, other contact information, and people they know. Knowing who’s behind all the calls or texts can go a long way toward proving your cheating suspicions.
Look into What She’s Doing on Social Media
Just like the phone, it is considered an invasion of privacy to access your wife or girlfriend’s social media accounts without her knowledge. However, even if she tries to hide things, you can still find out a lot about what she’s been up to, based on the public posts, comments, and photos you can find on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other social platforms.
By simply browsing, you can see if she is tagged in pictures with a person you don’t know. Maybe you see that she was out somewhere she said she never normally goes. Or you may find suggestive comments that she and someone else has been making to each other.
Become Closer with Her Friends
If your wife or girlfriend has been cheating on you, she has probably told at least one of her friends about it. You could just come out and ask them about it yourself, but it probably won’t get you the information you want. Instead, it will likely just put them on the defensive, and they could talk to your woman about what you’ve been up to. What you really want to do first is to try and develop relationships with her friends.
This is more of a long-game approach. It won’t necessarily be easy to get her friends to admit anything to you, and it will likely take some time to build their trust. But many people feel guilty knowing about things like cheating, especially if they start to feel close to you as well. Before you know it, they’ll spill the info you need to know. (Or maybe not…after all, it might not be true!)
Ask Her About It
One or all of the above approaches can get you at least some of the evidence you need to take that final step to end your suspicions: talk to her about it. Reveal the information you’ve gathered and see what she says. It probably won’t feel like good news, but if she is cheating on you, at least now it is out in the open. And from there, you can decide if you want to work your way through it or break up.
And even if you discover she’s not cheating on you, you should probably still think about having a bigger conversation with her about things in general. After all, the fact that you’ve been suspicious about something as big as infidelity means that there are deeper trust issues at work in your relationship that you should work toward resolving.